This may be the perfect job. You sit out on the beach all day, it's your job to stare at hot girls in the water, and you have to give them mouth to mouth (don't worry fat girls float).

Every time you hear "you don't look like your father", that's a sure sign that the mailman was there. They are responsible for more illegitimate children than Shawn Kemp.

Skinny white guys have options too. Let's break this down. The girls are on XTC, bass is pumping, and you're in a booth where no one can see from the waist down. What do you think happens.

Just look back at every Superhero you know...there's always girls "falling in love" with them (note: "Falling in love" is chick code for getting some)

If Mick Jagger can get laid, then so can you. It doesn't matter how bad looking you are, girls will beg for threesomes with you.

Don't worry, this doesn't actually require any talent. But as soon as you're put on the big screen, you're getting big time action.

You don't even really have to be a star or even good.

Something about drunk girls being pissed at their boyfriends at the end of the night and you still being coherent enough to close the deal seems to work out well.

When the model is half naked, you're half way there already.

Hollywood is a tough city to get a break in. And the "casting couch" is responsible for more breaks than anything else.