Getting good angles and proper use of the zoom is essential in any home made production. It's not something you can learn over night, but with enough practice, they'll be the next Scorsese.

Firearms in the home can be dangerous...but if you teach them how to use them safely, they could help defend the home in case of a zombie breakout. Remember shoot for the head...destroying the brain is the only way to kill them.

Frankly, this and helping pick up chicks is 95% of the reason to have a kid in the first place.

To win in a fight, you need to a good defense, and when there is an opening unleash hell.

Kids need to learn politics young. We don't want them to grow up republican.

These days, for them to really be popular in Junior High, they have to be able to handle their liquor. Teaching them how to bong a beer will also get them in with the older crowd which usually leads to easier women.

Being able to effectively tease a girl is an essential in picking them up. It's a fine line in what is crossing the line to pissing them off. It's better to make these mistakes younger when you're more easily forgiven.

To succeed in anything in life, it's better to highlight your strengths....like being able to be "lost" and shy.

Being able to check out women is essential for any man. Doing it inconspicuously is an art form which takes years of practice. It's better to have them learn young and make some mistakes than not learn it and have the police called cause you were looking at some girl "creepy".